Happy Birthday Kaitlin!!
Yesterday was my baby sister’s 20th birthday! It's another birthday that we had missed. My sister took a trip out to Pittsburgh, with my parents, to visit my other sister Dannielle. But I cannot get over that she is 20! I can remember like it was yesterday, when she was 5, that she was dancing around in our living room in the house on George Street. “Look! I’m a river dancer!” and then she would keep her arms nice and straight to her sides and start slamming her heels to the floor.. as annoying as it was to me at the time, looking back on it she was an adorable little girl. I also remember the 5 cent movies at Wind Gap Movie Theater on tuesdays that we never made it to! Oh and what a daddy’s girl she was and currently is. All she has to do is bat those pretty blue eyes and my dad is putty in her hands. She is a sassy, outspoken, and sensitive; and I adore her!
we pretended that we were at the beach
I know growing up, being 7 years older than Kaitlin, I wasn't always the nicest older sister to her. Looking back on it, I feel awful for some of the things that we put her through, like picking on her, and making her feel bad about herself. She is a little ball of sunshine and I am so proud of the woman that she is becoming.
Spending time with daddy
When I was little I was a gymnast for about 10 years. When I did gymnastics I would get out of school early and then stay at the gym until late at night. Most of the time, my brother and sisters would be stuck at the gym having to wait for me to finish practicing before they could go home. In the end, I ended up quitting gymnastics and I feel bad for all of the hours that they spent at the gym. I feel like they wasted so much of their childhood sitting around and waiting. I wish there was a way that I could give them back the time they missed out on.
Once I quit gymnastics, that's where my relationships with my siblings really started to blossom. I wanted to be around them all of the time because I felt like I missed out on being with them and I felt like I truly didn't know them. It would get to the point where if they went to hang out with a friend I would feel jealous because I wanted to spend my time with them. I loved taking my sisters shopping with me or going out to eat when I could drive. I loved watching my brother play his sports and be his little cheerleader in the stand. For once, I was able to wait and watch and I truly enjoyed every minute of it.
Now that we are older and we are starting out our lives, once again I feel like I’m missing out on something bigger. Dannielle lives out in Pittsburgh and recently got engaged! When Dannielle lived at home, I would pack up the boys and we would go up and see her no problem but now she is 5 hours away. It's not as simple to just pick up and go anymore. I am so happy that she found a career and found someone to start a life with. But with my own selfishness, I want her back and closer to me. I feel like I need her to be around. She is the grounded one. The one that tells me like it is and doesn't have a filter. My heart hurts. I miss her so much !
I love his little smile
My brother Dirk has been married for over a year now to my sister-in-law, Jessica, who is more like a real sister to me. They live only 30 minutes from us and I don't get to see them as often as I would like. But I hope that they both know how much I love them and if they ever need help with anything I will always be there for them. I would like to be an aunt soon so please start working on that :-)
talking to the kitty
rainy day calls for Chinese food
I am so accustomed to celebrating everyone’s birthdays all together with all of the smiles and inside jokes. The celebrations and get-togethers makes me feel complete. But, right now, pieces of my heart are spread across Pennsylvania. Wherever time and fate brings us, I hope that it makes the distance feel a little less distant and brings us closer as a family. I love you all so much and I hope that I get to see you soon.